Havely's family is "blueblood" from Virginia, but I believe that her ancestors were more of the mercantile persuasion during the war. (Although she has some family member who was some sort of naval hero in the war of 1812, supposedly.)
My family is from Missouri on my father's side and Tennessee on my mother's side; one of my mother's ancestors was a Confederate Cavalry soldier. When I was seventeen, my mom gave me his Cav sabre that had been passed down for generations. Stupidly, I used it to cut a watermelon at a party, thinking it was a cool thing to do. Mom was utterly enraged, in a quiet, contemptuous way, when she found out... and she took back the sabre. She said that I did the heirloom and the man who'd used it in war a great dishonor. Now that I'm older, I agree. It's now in a bank vault, where it will stay until my son becomes of age.
Who it belonged to, I can't say for sure. His surname was Thomas, and he was enlisted. I'm not much into geneology, and until recently, I didn't have much of an interest in the civil war. There are just too many reminders of it around here... cemetaries, monuments to dead heros, and so on. And of course, the ubiquitous Battle Flag displayed on every redneck's truck...
Bill